Animals Have Instincts. You Have Intuition: Here are 4 Ways to Develop It

Birds may become "habituated" to hum...

Instinct is defined as a behavior pattern that is universal for a species — that is, every member of the species does it without any opportunity to learn.

Intuition is defined as a kind of immediate knowledge or awareness not based upon some logical process — a form of insight that brings together appropriately relationships between the elements of a problem or situation.

The key distinction to be made here is that by definition instinct can only be applied to animals while intuition can only be applied to human beings.

Intuition allows you to discover unseen realities and hidden truths. It alerts you to problems and warns you of risks and dangers you might not otherwise detect. It is that sixth sense — that faculty of the mind that operates independently of reason and logic. It is a way of sensing something that produces instantaneous comprehension and can occur spontaneously.

Certain qualities make you more sensitive to intuitive experiences like relaxation, patience, and self-control. Do not confuse intuition with hope, emotion, or intellect. Rather, it is developed through trial and error. Moreover, it cannot be explained. You know when you have it.

Awakening intuition is about learning to trust yourself. You need to let your intuition guide you and then be willing to follow that guidance directly and fearlessly.

Intuition can be developed to produce genius in individuals thought to be mediocre or even of inferior intelligence. Here then are four tips for developing your intuition:
1. Learn to tune into intuitive experiences and to recognize their quality. Intuitive impulses are a form of sensed perception and are distinguished by a vague sense of being certain or almost certain.
2. Be aware of soft facts as well as hard facts. Soft facts are less formal or obvious such as impressions, feelings, inclinations, and vibrations. Hard facts are logical, objective, and overt. Soft facts are hunches, intuitive, and invisible. Hard facts are obvious, conscious, and tangible. In most situations both soft and hard facts will reveal themselves.
3. Intuition is commonly experienced within the context of choice. When a choice need to be made, intuition will signal stop or go. This faculty is developed by comparison and contrast. By comparing your subjective experience with the eventual correctness or incorrectness of your choice, you can eventually sense the expression which will match up.
4. Be true to your intuition. Extraneous factors will often intrude, such as social pressures, wish fulfillment, greed, impatience and so on which can alter the basis for your decision.

A word of caution. Do not rely solely upon your intuition. Study the situation. Use the other side of your brain and do your research. After you have done your research, then let your intuition guide you to your final choice. Intuition is something to be used in conjunction with your logical, rational abilities.

Now you know that the next time you hear a commentator, analyst, broadcaster, etc. associate the term instinct with human beings, it is charitable to say that you are listening to someone who is just being imprecise in their thinking.

Now its your turn. Do you trust your intuition? If so what experiences have you had?
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14 Ways to Save Your Marriage

It is important to realize the difference between loving and being in love.” As C. S. Lewis put it, “It is this other, quieter love that enables two people to keep their promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run. “Being in love” was merely the explosion that started the engine.”

Aside from the fact that most couples share in the work routine these days byholding down jobs, here are fourteen ways to stay in tune with your marriage partner and save your marriage:

1. Find and maintain a mutual interest you can share.

Marriage License Check-In
Marriage License Check-In

2. Cut down on the amount of time you watch television. If you can manage to do this, it will help your marriage. If you and your spouse like certain favorite programs, you could of course simply watch those and ignore the rest of the offerings. The choice is up to you.

3. Be ready and willing to give 75 percent of yourself, whether you get that much in return from your mate or not.

4. Strive continually to improve yourself as a person and your overall personality. Being a good person is, in itself, part and parcel of the secret of a happy marriage.

5. If you have a tendency to buy too many things with a credit card, start leaving your card (or cards) at home. Money issues head the list of conflicts in far too many marriages.

6. Whatever problems confront you and your mate, decide to face them together. Marriage means sharing the hard times (if any) as well as the good ones.

7. Avoid arguments on what each of you “wants out of life.” Such arguments can develop into a stalemate. Try to find a mutual ground on which both of you can agree regarding future goals. What do you enjoy together?

8. Find some way to compliment your mate every day. One of the major causes of tension in a marriage is the neglect of courtesies and compliments. Everyone likes to feel that he or she is appreciated. This includes your not forgetting birthdays and anniversaries.

9. Go off somewhere together at least a few times a year. If possible, take a short trip once every six weeks or quarter.

10. Kiss each other goodbye each morning when the day’s work separates you, or when you both leave for the jobs you hold. These little opportunities to show affection are very important for a happy marriage. Don’t fail to express love and appreciation that is due.

11. Bring your spouse a little gift now and then, have dinner out together and enjoy some special entertainment.

12. Plan one of your favorite meals (or dishes) occasionally. Many couples take turns with the cooking, surprising each other with exciting meals.

13. Go dancing together now and then, and choose a place where at least a good portion of the music provided is smooth and romantic.

14. Have room in your home life for religion. You know how the saying goes: “The family that prays together stays together.”

The above ideas and suggestions are not the only recommended ones for saving your marriage, but they will definitely help to cement your marriage and make it a more enjoyable one.

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How to Overcome the Mismanagement of Stress

There is rarely a simple or single solution to any problem no matter how large or small. However, the situation can be made worse if the resulting stress is mismanaged since mismanaging stress can lead to a variety of health problems. There is evidence linking the mismanagement of stress with upper respiratory infection, coronary artery disease, autoimmune disorder, poor wound healing, and depression. These health problems represent the extreme conditions that can occur.

Splenda Essentials and Peaches

Eat Right Reduce Stress

With regards to lesser conditions, there is solid evidence that stress affects most of the basic functions of life, including sleep, memory, managing pain, sexual activity, and getting nourishment from food. It is also becoming acceptable knowledge that many of the changes usually attributed to getting old are likely caused by or accelerated by stress. These changes include the graying of your hair, the decline of your immune system, the aches and pains you accumulate, and your basic ability to learn new information and remember all the wonderful things that have happened to you along the way.

Although stress-related physical symptoms can appear to be overwhelming, stress can be managed and the physical conditions can be minimized or even eliminated, regardless of the cause. Here we will focus on some of the more common symptoms such as frequent headaches, fatigue, insomnia, and restlessness.

For frequent headaches, get a good night’s sleep. Have something to eat and do relaxation exercises for the neck, head, and shoulders. Message the temples, and scalp, or put a warm, dry, cloth or a cold, wet one (whichever feels better) over, face, head, or neck.

For fatigue, don’t try to fight the fatigue. Sleep as long as you can and go to bed early every night. Eat small amounts of complex carbohydrate foods regularly during the day. And, consider taking a course of B complex vitamin pills or Ginseng.

For insomnia, drink a hot milky drink before bedtime. Eat protein and carbohydrate rich foods in the evening and avoid tea and coffee, especially at this time. Eat your evening meals earlier. And, reduce your alcoholic intake.

For restlessness, try relaxation exercise such as lying on the floor and progressively stretch and release each and every part of the body. These relaxing exercises help you to recognize and distinguish between the different sensations of tension and relaxation.

Use these strategies to manage the symptoms associated with stress and therefore minimize the possibility of stress escalated to the more extreme physical conditions earlier mentioned.

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10 Ways to Read for Personal Growth

If you are like most people, you have to read  a tremendous amount of materials at the office, or at school just to keep up. Considering all the reading materials you get just in the course of a day, if you read all this information word for word, you’ll wind up spending all your time reading and not have much time for anything else.

Egyptian boys reading

Readers are Leaders

These Ten Ways to Read for Personal Growth will help you to experience reading, not as a chore to be put off as long as you can, but as an enjoyable and satisfying skill.

1. Take at least one minute to review the material before reading it. First, skim to get a feel of what the piece contains, then the introductory material, section and chapter titles, index, and any other signposts. Next, treat the body of the text as a series of paragraphs, each paragraph being a self-contained unit with his own message to convey.

2. Read by paragraph. As soon as you have grasped the message, move immediately onto the next paragraph and repeat the process.

3. Become an active, rather than a passive reader. Instead of reading individual words, actively search out the important, descriptive, and meaningful ideas. Don’t get bogged down in details. Move rapidly over the material.

4. Develop the knack of concatenation (linking two things together). Stop reading one word at a time and develop the habit of joining several words and repeating them as one unit. Learn to read by thought units rather than by individual words. You should take in between four and six words in a single glance.

5. Don’t linger or reread words, phrases, or sentences. As difficult as it may be to break this non-productive habit, doing so will pay tremendous dividends. One way you can do this is to place a small slip of paper over the lines you have just read.

6. If your time permits, read at least one hour every day. Break it up into 15 minute segments, if necessary, and both select your reading materials carefully and read at optimum speed. Get rid of distractions and concentrate on what you are reading.

7. Eliminate poor physical habits such as sounding out the words in silent reading.

8. Watch for the signpost in reading. Signposts are words or phrases which tell you in a split second whether there’s going to be an abrupt change in the author’s trend of thought or whether, on the contrary, the writer is really going to add more details to what is already been said. Some of the common turn about signals are: but, despite, on the contrary, however, nonetheless, yet, and rather. When you see these words you know instantaneously that the author is about to introduce a thought that is in opposition to the one he has just stated.

9. While you shouldn’t sacrifice comprehension for speed, make a conscious effort to increase your reading speed. Still, make sure you understand what you are reading.

10. Reinforce what you read. At the earliest opportunity, think back on what you learned in your last reading session. Review the important points and any related information relayed by the author. To make it easy, here are five questions you can ask yourself about what you read, What was the piece about? What important information was presented? What, if any, opinions did the writer present? What is your opinion of the piece? Name one element of the piece that makes it stand apart. This procedure helps to firmly implant the information in your memory.

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Seven Steps to Good Male-Female Relationships Whether You’re Married or Single

If you are in an intense emotional relationship and it begins to deteriorate, it cEnglish: Robinia pseudoacacia, Fabaceae, have a devastating effect both on your work and on other aspects of your personal life.  Also, if you are someone who needs that type of relationship to feel personally fulfilled, then you need to take the steps to make sure that it’s a healthy one.

These seven steps are valuable to you whether you are married or single. If you are married, perhaps one or more of the steps may or may not pertain to you and similarly so if you are single. Never- theless, if you are a man or woman, married or single, read this article carefully and use what applies to you.

1. Learn about the Values and Lifestyle of the Other Person

Your rules of your life are your values. Determine if your values and the other person’s are compatible. Ask yourself constantly, “What is the right thing to do?” Consider what changes you would have to make. And, remember that one change makes way for the next and gives you the opportunity to grow.  If you are a woman and are serious about establishing a quality relationship with a man, offer to share his interests, and go with him to places he likes to go. Do it actively and enthusiastically. If you think that the places he likes to go are too way out and would require too much of an adjustment for you, but his other qualities make him worthwhile, then discuss it with him and work out a compromise.

2. Get to know his Friends, Relatives, and Acquaintances.

There is an old saying; by your friends you shall know them. If your man is one who is upwardly mobile, you can quickly tell that by his choice of friends.

Look for such qualities as stability, industriousness, self-discipline, and honesty. An upwardly mobile man will immediately demonstrate these qualities. Don’t let yourself be swayed by others opinion. Do not discuss your boyfriend with your female friend. And if you are a man, do not discuss your girlfriend with your male friend. Don’t push obligations early and never ask to borrow money even if you really need it and feel certain that she would loan it to you.

3. Clarify Sex Roles and Responsibilities

Eliminate role conflict. Each family, knowingly or unknowingly, maintains a system in which members fulfill certain roles or functions. Family members are most comfortable when these roles are carefully spelled out. Develop clear division of labor and capacity. God made women and men different and we should appreciate and respect the differences instead of trying to act as if there are no differences.  Acquire flexibility to adjust to different sex roles. Each of us in the course of a day, occupy different roles, but not the least in importance are the roles of husband, wife, father, and mother. Seek to grow in the different roles. We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are.

Provide mutual support and encouragement in meeting responsibilities. We live by encouragement, and we die without it—slowly, sadly, and angrily. Few things in the world are more powerful than a positive push. Smile and offer a word of optimism and hope. Say “you can do it” when things are tough.

No dominant role should be the woman’s and no submissive role should be the man’s. Each family, knowingly or unknowingly, maintains a system in which members fulfill certain roles or functions. Whenever possible, the man should always be the primary breadwinner.

Make sex a part of the overall relationship, but never build your relationship solely on sex. Moreover, sex should never be withheld as punishment. Marriage is a union between two adults, not between a parent and a child. The idea of punishing one or the other in a marital relationship is silly and childish. A woman should never refuse to have sex with her man and vice versa unless there is a physical reason or a legitimate illness.

Infidelity should never be accepted by either party, if based on a prior understanding. If both the man and the woman sincerely desire to make each other happy, then there’s no such thing as boring sex. Don’t make getting an orgasm the essence of a sexual relationship. Foreplay is whatever makes both individuals look forward to sexual intercourse. Always make time for sex whether it’s in the morning, afternoon, or evening.

4. Be Flexible in How You Can Meet Your Mate.

Be open to the possibilities of meeting someone any place, anywhere. Every lonely person should remember that meeting a suitable partner to build abiding love and happiness needs only one connection, one meeting, one social function, one planned effort…and any time could be that one time.  Possibilities for contacting potential, romantic-love partners increase proportionately with the number of approaches made towards potential partners.

Don’t be turned off by the other’s approach. Stop letting age be a factor. Get beyond the superficial, discover each other’s values and interests. Sex can be on the first night, the second night, or any other night. Don’t let others determine the quality of your sexual relationship. And, don’t discuss your sexual relationship with others

5. Work on Your own Level of Emotional Maturity.

Strive to become emotionally self-reliant. It is estimated that only about ten percent of the population has developed emotional self-reliance. The ability to think and act independently is the essence of being emotionally self-reliant. It begins when we are determined to do everything we can possibly do for ourselves, emotionally and physically, in preference to seeking someone to do it for us.

Balance your relationship with other friends. Consider this definition of a friend — a friend is a person who listens attentively while you are saying nothing. Or try this one — a friend is someone who knows you well and still likes you. Remember who is the most important person in your life, but don’t neglect your own personal growth.

Dwell on the best qualities in the other person, rather than the worst. Accept stress as a normal consequence of being alive, and use it to your advantage. Learn to appreciate your own company. By itself, marriage has little or no relationship to happiness. It is a by-product of a self-reliant, productive, and creative way of life. The individual who has not learned to be happy while single has just as little chance of being happy in marriage.

6. Develop Interests and Hobbies, but Don’t Let it Affect your Commitment.

Continue to learn and to develop your mind. Remember, the mind is like the stomach. It’s not how much you put into it that counts, but how much it digests. Keep in mind that doing interesting things makes you an interesting person.

Take time for everything. a. Take time to work. It’s the price of success. b. Take time to think. It’s the source of power. c. Take time to read. It’s the fountain of wisdom. d. Take Time to Dream. It’s hitching your wagon to a star. e. Take Time to be friendly. It’s the road to happiness. f. Take time to love and be loved. It’s the privilege of the gods. g. Take time to play. It’s the secret of perpetual youth. h. Take time to look around. It’s too short a day to be selfish. i. Take time to laugh. It is the music of the soul.

Develop knowledge of the things that interest your partner. Check different sources for continuing learning. Keep up with current events and build your vocabulary. To relax the mind is to lose it. If you are not working at a regular job, become involved in community activities. Discover if your hobby can be developed into a money- making activity.

7. Be Willing to Converse and Discuss, but Never Argue.

Resolve any differences before going to bed. Communication does not begin with being understood, but with understanding others. Always keep open lines of communication. The real art of conversation is not to say the right thing, in the right moment, in the right place, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing. As long as at the tempting word remains unspoken, you are its master; once you utter it, you are its slave.

Always look to give praise and compliments, rather than criticism. The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. Reinforce the good things that your mate does, you’ll make sure those get repeated.

Recognize the difference between a discussion and an argument and choose discussion. Arguments are attempts to manipulate and subordinate others. We argue only if we feel weak. If we feel we are in the dominating position, we do not bother to argue. Arguing is a form of nagging and is always a clear sign of dependency. When we give up trying to influence others, we have no further need to argue with them.

Discussion is the anvil on which the spark of truth is struck. When arguing with a difficult person, make sure that you try to look at matters from the other’s point of view. Realize that the other’s point of is a result of their personality, education, and experiences.

It’s important for your mental health and well-being that your relationships are healthy ones. Become more self-reliant and make sure that your relationships are mutually beneficial.  You’ll be a much happier person.

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More on Choosing a Stress Free Diet

Long grain rice from the United States

Grains Growing in the Field

In a previous post, Choose a Stress Free Diet, I discussed the importance of your choice of foods and its impact on managing the stress in your life.

Here, I will focus on specific elements in specific foods that produce the desired impact. While some amount of stress is expected and, indeed, desirable, ( it means that you are living an active, and hopefully a productive life) excessive and unmanaged stress can lead to many types of physical problems such as high blood pressure, migraine, stomach disorders, anxiety, depression, and panic. Even certain research indicates that the possibility exists that certain disorders of the immune system can be triggered by stress.

Although there no single best way to manage stress, what foods you eat and its relationship to stress is often overlooked in favor of meditating and exercising. While I am not minimizing the beneficial effects of exercising and controlling how and what dominates your thinking, I believe that what you eat is equally if not more important.

In the midst of this emphasis on the so-called obesity epidemic, it’s important to realize that nutritional deficiencies are making you more vulnerable to stress. Specifically, the diets that are deficient in several nutrients, including zinc, vitamin D, and magnesium contribute to the elevation of stress in your life.

Let’s consider foods that have these three nutrients, beginning with zinc. In addition to countering the effects of stress, zinc is the component of several enzymes and the hormone, insulin. It maintains immune function and is necessary for sexual maturation and reproduction. Whole grains such as brown rice, whole wheat flour, oats, whole grain cereals, corn, and beans are common sources of zinc.

Vitamin D, while also important in encountering the effects of stress, is also important for bone density, maintaining a good appetite, and for some forms of cancer, Alzheimer’s, and other maladies. Vitamin D is found in such common foods as fortified milk, eggs, cheese, and yogurt.

Magnesium, in addition to countering the effects of stress, regulates enzyme activity which is necessary for nerve function. Foods that are rich in magnesium include green leafy vegetables, nuts, whole grains, and even chocolates.

As you notice, I don’t mention flesh foods anywhere in this article. I am a vegetarian so flesh foods are not in my consideration, although I do eat eggs and dairy foods occasionally. Other writers on this topic may include flesh foods in their food group. I don’t.

To summarize, eating more vegetables is essential in counteracting the effects of stress in your life. Vegetables are the most neglected, but the most beneficial food available to you. Choose at least three or four different vegetables and eat them regularly. They will not only counter the effects of stress in your life, but will stimulate your immune system, keep cholesterol metabolism in a healthy range, and keep your blood pressure in check.

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Choose a Stress Free Diet

Stress has been with us is the beginning of time. But today’s life challenges are far more complex than they used to be. Living in an age of immense and increasingly rapid change, we are subjected to greater, more insistent, inescapable pressures to adapt, keep up, and compete than at any other time.

An act that you can take right now which will have great benefit to you is to choose a stress free diet. While fasting and purification regimes allow your body’s internal organs to rest and recuperate, a consistent healthy diet is what’s necessary for the long-term. Among the most important food to consume are fresh fruit, vegetables, and fiber. If you eat meat, make sure it’s lean and remove the fat before cooking. Many of the foods we rely upon at times of stress and tiredness are themselves stress-inducing.

But there are healthy alternative to most of them, many of which are which are more palatable than their stress-inducing counterparts. Your attitude is as important to your health

A variety of foods made from wheat.

Healthy Foods

as what you actually eat. Always put time aside to enjoy your food. Savor each mouthful. Don’t eat while reading, cooking, talking on the phone, or working. If you tend to eat more when you’re depressed, watch for the signs and try to do something completely different – – do some exercises, relax with a book, or visit a friend. And, above all, whenever you eat, enjoy your food.

Now here are some healthy alternatives to stress-inducing foods according to these groupings: sweet foods, saturated/animal fats, and processed/refined foods: Instead of sweet foods such as: jams, cakes, sugary cereals, sweet drinks, puddings, pies, and sweet drinks, choose apple butter, apple and pear spread, carob chocolate substitute, raisins, dates, figs, dried fruits, and fresh fruit juices.

Instead of saturated/animal fats such as: fatty red meat, pork, bacon, sausages, hamburgers, fried foods, butter and hidden fats in dressings, sausages, and soups, choose lean chicken, fish, polyunsaturated vegetable oil and margarines, low-fat yogurt and cottage cheese.

Instead of processed/refined foods such as: white flour, white rice, white bread, prepackaged foods, and all foods in the “sweet” category, choose brown rice, whole wheat flour, rice, barley, corn, oats, whole meal bread, whole wheat pasta, beans, and whole grains cereals.

The modern-day diet contains several groups which though unhealthy, many of us feel that we can’t do without. As I mentioned earlier, there are many alternatives to this. So try the stress-free alternatives above. You will probably end up preferring them on grounds of taste alone and experience a significant reduction in your level of stress.

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